On the road
by Danish Existence
Summary: "We sort of stumbled into each other and despite this being the least perfect time, I still found myself falling for you in between all the fighting and everything else." Alistair. NB! Discontinued.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N**: This is my fist attempt at writing fanfiction. It is supposed to be a collection of small stories with Alistair and F! Cousland as main protagonists, written from her perspective. The story starts after the Battle at Ostagard. Two Grey Wardens, Alistair and Elissa Cousland set upon a mission to fight the Blight after their lives had just been saved by Flemeth, the Witch of the Wilds. Flemeth's daughter Morrigan had joined them._

___Disclaimer: This story is based on the game Dragon Age:Origins, and I use their ideas for entertainment purposes only. _

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They had been walking in silence for several hours now. Elissa has asked the witch a few questions at the beginning of their journey, but her short tempered replies did not invite for further conversation. Alistair was following in her steps at a short distance and he remained silent. Her mabari hound was the noisiest in their small party, moving back and forth and sniffing everything around him. She could tell that the sun was reaching below the horizon. The forest around them was getting gloomier. Twisted trees were casting long cool shadows and the mist in the small valleys was rising.

Elissa felt weary and her mood was low. With nothing else to distract her, gloomy thoughts were haunting her. Everything had happened too fast. Over night she had been cast into a tumult sea, all her anchors cut off, and since that fated moment her world has been spinning madly out of control. Now she had to face the tidal wave which was the Blight, and the task seemed insurmountable. She was still trying to get all that happened to sink in, but she felt numb and unable to get a grip of herself. She was still waiting to wake up from a nightmare.

She followed blindly.

First Duncan. After her parents have been treacherously murdered in their own house while she watched powerless, she followed the man that dragged her out from her burning home against her own will. She wasn't given a choice about becoming a Grey Warden, nor about anything else the job entitled. She followed orders.

And now she followed Alistair. He was all that was left of the Grey Wardens. And he wished to carry on with the impossible task of stopping the Blight. Alistair's heartbreaking plea and his pained and anguished look which mirrored the way she felt affected her deeply. He asked for her help. With no place to go, with no hope and no goal in sight, she decided to help him. It was easier to make his pain go away than hers. That's how she found herself here. But no matter how hard she tried to suppress the horrid memories of the last couple of weeks, they surfaced at short intervals, and all she wished now was to sink into a blissful sleep.

"We should find a place to rest for the night." she said. "Do you know of any good place for that around here, Morrigan?"

"No. There's nothing around here for miles. If we keep walking though the night, we'll reach out of the Wilds by morning." the witch answered, without stopping or turning.

"I don't feel safe in this place, especially at night. I think it would be easier to continue our journey after some rest and in day light. Alistair, what do you think?" Elissa said allowing him to catch up to her before she continued walking.

"I think we should find higher ground. It'll be easier to defend." he answered, falling behind her again when the narrow path no longer allowed them to walk side by side.

"Have it your way." Morrigan scoffed. "Follow me."

By the time they reached the place Morrigan was leading them to, it was almost entirely dark. They climbed up a low hill covered by only few trees. The one growing at the top was very large, its branches reaching long in every direction. Elissa thought it would have provided better shelter if it had leaves, but it was too early in the spring. The leaves were not even sprouting yet. She had never before slept directly under the sky, and she had nothing else but the cloths and armor she was wearing. Alistair had been foresighted when he told her to bring her backpack, but she didn't think she needed to pack a blanket before heading to the Tower of Ishal in Ostagar.

"This place looks fine. Thank you, Morrigan." Elissa said, dropping her backpack. The witch scolded, but said nothing. She walked a bit further away from where they stopped and she dropped her bag.

"I'll gather some wood for a fire." Alistair said.

Elissa nodded, but he was already walking away. Fenris was sniffing around and scratching the roots and leaves on the ground. She looked around and started to gather everything that could be burned. The temperature had dropped considerably after the sunset, so they would have to keep the fire up all night. They had nothing to eat. Elissa thought that her hunting skills were too modest for the task. They had no bow, and she didn't think she would be able to hunt in the dark anyhow. Not to mention the lack of any other necessities to prepare a meal.

When Alistair returned he dropped the pile of dry wood and searched his backpack for flint. Elissa piled the wood and helped him make the fire in silence.

"I guess we need to arrange some sort of watch for the night." Elissa said looking up from the stick she was pocking the dry grass with to keep the flame alive. "I know you said you have some kind of darkspawn repellent, Morrigan, and it seems to be working, but we better be prepared."

"Yes, I should think so." she answered.

"Then would you mind taking the first shift for a couple of hours? Alistair can replace you, and I will take second part of the night, if that is acceptable."

She took the silence as an approval. She removed her weapons and lay by the fire on the cold and damp ground, placing her head on her bag. It was hard and uncomfortable, but she was grateful to be able to close her eyes and rest.

Elissa found herself on a shore. The place was peaceful. Her parents were there, smiling at her, and Oriana and little Oren were there as well. She felt happy. They walked and talked and sat down at a table together. Then Elissa saw them go towards the water without looking back. Big gates closed behind them. Elissa turned around, her back clinging to the gate. Black smoke was rising from several places in the horizon. A white fog was starting to obstruct her view, was approaching her, surrounding her, pressing closer and closer against her. She felt afraid. There was something in the fog, something that was terrifying her. She turned to the gate trying to open it, but the gate did not move. She tried desperately to cry for help, to call her parents, but no sound came out. She turned her back to the gate again to face the invisible terror which was now only feet away. She was trapped, paralyzed with fear; she was suffocating and could do nothing but await the inevitable. She felt herself yanked up.

"Elissa." she heard. "Wake up."

Her body was stiff and unresponsive. She blinked. She saw Alistair crouched besides her, holding her arms in a tight grip. She shuddered and let her forehead fall on his shoulder. His cool armor was refreshing.

"It was only a bad dream." he said softly in her hair. "You're safe."

She breathed relieved. "It felt so real." she said lifting her head to look at him.

"I know. I should have told you earlier about the dreams. I'm sorry." he said, brushing her hair from her face, and letting his hands slide down her shoulders back on her arms.

"The dreams?" she asked distracted. His face was inches away from hers. She felt his sweet warm breath on her face when he spoke.

"Grey Wardens can sense and hear darkspawn also in their dreams. It takes a bit, but eventually you will learn to block the dreams out."

"Oh…" she said in a whisper. "Thank you, Alistair."

"Well, I heard you trashing in your sleep and I thought I should tell you. It was scary for me at first too." He let go of her and raised himself suddenly. When he talked again, his tone had changed as well. "Now that you're awake we should get a move on."

"But don't you need more rest?" she asked bewildered.

"I'm fine." he said, and strapped his sword and shield on his back.

His firm tone left no place for an argument. She raised herself, gathered her stuff and called Morrigan who was lying further away, in the same spot she had picked earlier.

"You have changed your mind, I see?" Morrigan asked, and Elissa guessed she was referring to the fact that it was still dark.

"Yes. We are ready to continue our journey now." Elissa answered. She wondered what Alistair was thinking or if he only agreed to camp for her sake.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I owe many thanks to **Adalae_Amell** who edited this chapter.

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**New A/N :** Following the review from bush_viper which I appreciate, I will review this chapter as soon as I'll get the time. I will cut down on the original dialogue from the game, but not entirely, because I think it has its purpose. And that is to keep the story close to the events from the game and to make it recognizable . The point of this story is to present my version of Elissa Cousland, and how she reacted to the people she met, to what they said and did. But I'll try to find a better balance, because I think bush_viper is right, the original dialogue predominates in this particular chapter, which it's not so interesting.

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Intro and background: While in Lothering, Elissa and Alistair find out that Arl Eamon is gravely ill, and Alistair insists they travel to Redcliffe Castle. Upon their arrival to Redcliffe village, they meet Arl Eamon's brother, Bann Teagan, who tells them that there has been no contact with the castle; no one knows what happened there, but every night the village gets attacked by undead creatures coming from the keep. After defending the village from the attack the following night, they decide to storm the castle. Just as they were preparing to do so, Arlessa Isolde, Arl Eamon's wife comes into the village, insisting that Bann Teagan accompany her, alone, back to the castle where she left her child. She refuses to tell them anything else. Bann Teagan agrees to do so despite Elissa and Alistair's reservations. When Elissa and Alistair (and their companions) make it to the Castle through a secret passage, which Bann Teagan told them about, they find the place overrun by the undead. They fight their way through and search for survivors.

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Elissa was still rubbing her neck as they entered the Main Hall of Redcliffe castle. It hurt to swallow; she could still feel the Revenant's tight magical grip around her neck, which not long before had pulled her up in the air, slamming her hard on the ground. It was a miracle she had gotten away with only a sore neck and an assortment of bruises, which would probably cover her skin for days.

The Main Hall of Redcliffe Castle was quite impressive, and it reminded her a bit of home. In many ways it was not very different from the one at Highever, where she spent her entire life before she had been made homeless. She didn't have much time to admire the remarkable weapons and armor collection, nor the rich tapestry that decorated the walls and furniture. Her attention was immediately drawn to the end of the Hall where Arlessa Isolde, Bann Teagan and a little boy which she guessed must be Connor, the Arlessa's son, were standing.

As they cautiously approached, Elissa felt a chill in the air prickle her skin even though the raging fire place behind them emanated a ravenous heat. She wasn't sure if her mind was playing tricks on her, but she thought she could hear strange faint whispers in the air. The scene taking place in front of them was even more perplexing. Isolde stood hunched, with a drained look on her face, while Connor was clapping his hands at his uncle, who was crawling on the floor and dancing around without any music. Elissa exchanged quick glances with Alistair, and they halted a short distance from the three.

When the dance ended, Bann Teagan remained seated on the floor at Connor's feet. The boy looked up at them and spoke in a deep ethereal voice.

"So, these are our visitors? The ones you've told me about mother."

"Yes, Connor." Isolde answered in a shaky voice. She seemed terrified and barely even glanced at her son.

The boy's face looked hideously contorted. His veins clearly visible through his translucent skin, and it looked as if they had burst and blood had pooled, forming dark blotches in certain areas. He had dark violet, almost black, circles around his eyes.

"And this is the one who defeated my forces? The ones to reclaim my village," the boy asked his mother demandingly.

"Yes," answered Isolde, looking down at her feet.

"And now it's staring at me. What is it mother? I can't see it well enough."

"This… this is a woman, Connor. Just as I am," Isolde replied, her voice trembling with fear.

"You lie!" Connor interjected, causing the Arlessa to wince. "This woman is nothing like you. Why, just look at her! Half your age and pretty too. I'm surprised you don't order her executed in a fit of jealousy."

"Connor, I beg you," Isolde cried, "Don't hurt anyone."

Connor shook his head. "Mo… mother? Wha… what's happening? Where am I?" His voice reverted to one of a confused child.

"Oh, thank the Maker," Isolde turned to her son, "Connor… Connor, can you hear me?" she asked pleadingly.

One more shake of his head and the monstrous voice was back. "Get away from me, foul woman!" he growled, pushing the Arlessa away. "You are beginning to bore me."

"Maker's breath!" exclaimed Ser Perth. "What has happened to her?"

"Grey Warden," Isolde pleaded with Elissa, "please, don't hurt my son. He is not responsible for what he does."

Elissa felt extremely angry at Isolde. She had disliked her from the moment Isolde had greeted them in the village. She would have overlooked Isolde's rude greeting given the circumstances, but her condescending reaction towards Alistair had been so hurtful and angered Elissa beyond her understanding. If Alistair was affected by it in any way, he didn't show it. It made Elissa think he was expecting no better, which made her shudder at the thought of how poorly he might have been treated as a child by this woman.

And now, this scene proved that Isolde had lied to them in the village, putting everyone's life at risk. She could have at least warned Bann Teagan, Elissa thought, in stead of leading him blindly into danger. Elissa had no idea what had happened to him, but Bann Teagan was certainly not himself. Nor was Connor, for that matter. She believed that the mage they found locked in the dungeon was right when he suspected the boy might be possessed. But she knew close to nothing of demon possession, and therefore she wouldn't make any hasty decisions.

"I don't intend to hurt the child." Elissa told Isolde.

"I wish I could say the same," the demon inside Connor yelled angrily. "Wait, no, I don't." he added, a predatory look on his face.

"Connor didn't mean to do this," Isolde cried, "It was that mage, the one who poisoned Eamon. He started all this. He summoned this demon. Connor was just trying to help his father."

"And made a deal with a demon to do so? Foolish child," Morrigan spat indignantly.

"It was a fair deal," the demon responded. "Father is alive, just as I wanted. Now it's my turn to sit on the throne and send out armies to conquer the world," he continued in a grand voice. "Nobody tells me what to do anymore!"

"Nooobody tells him what to do!" shouted Bann Teagan, laughing hysterically. "Noooobody!"

"Quiet uncle!" Connor threatened. "I warned you what would happen if you keep shouting, didn't I? Yes, I did." He pointed towards his uncle, and then spoke again, "But let's keep things civil. This woman will have the audience she seeks."

He addressed Elissa in an arrogant tone. "Tell us, woman, what did you come here for?"

"I came to stop you." Elissa answered calmly.

"I'm not finished playing! You can't make me stop!" the demon yelled stubbornly. "I think it's trying to spoil my fun, mother." Connor whined to his mother as if expecting her to do something about it to please him.

"I… I…don't think…" Isolde stammered, sobbing.

The boy started shaking, and when he spoke his voice was full of rage. "Of course you don't. Ever since you sent the knights away, you do nothing but deprive me of my fun. Frankly, it's getting dull! I crave excitement! And action! This woman spoiled my sport by saving that stupid village. And now she will repay me!"

By the time Connor started running, a terrible noise filled the room. The suits of armor decorating the Hall came alive and started to attack them indiscriminately. Chaos broke out in the Main Hall in a matter of seconds. Ser Perth, and the few knights who were accompanying them, took on one suit of armor. Morrigan tried to cast a stunning spell with no effect, so she ran trying to put some distance between herself and the heavily armored suits, which were stumbling around throwing violent blows aimlessly, hitting everything in their path. Elissa and Leliana engaged one suit and Alistair another. After bashing one into oblivion, Alistair turned and knocked Bann Teagan to the ground, causing him to lose consciousness. Soon all of the suits were reduced to twitching pieces of armor on the ground.

Isolde, who had been hiding in a corner, ran up to Bann Teagan and helped him up.

"Teagan, are you all right?" Isolde asked, shaking.

"Better now, I think," he said rubbing his jaw. "My mind is my own again."

"Blessed Andraste," Isolde praised, "I would have never forgiven myself had you died. Not after I brought you here. The fool I am. Please," she pleaded in a pained voice looking around at them, "Connor is not responsible for this. There must be some way we can save him."

"You knew this all along, didn't you?" Elissa couldn't help asking, though she already knew the answer.

"Yes…" Isolde hesitated, "I didn't tell you because I believed we could help him. I still do."

"Clearly the child is an abomination." Morrigan said, convinced. "There is…only one way to stop it."

"He's not always the demon you saw," Isolde said with desperation. "Connor is still inside him, and sometimes he breaks through. Please, I just want to protect him."

"Isn't that what started this?" Bann Teagan asked harshly. "You hired the mage to teach Connor in secret, to protect him."

"If they discovered Connor had magic, they'd take him away," Isolde sniveled. "I thought if he learned just enough to hide it, then…" She stopped speaking as began choking on her own sobs.

"Where is Connor now?" Elissa asked, looking towards the door she thought the boy had gone through.

"I think he ran upstairs, to the family quarters," answered Bann Teagan.

"Violence scares him. I know that might seem strange," Isolde intervened weakly. "He might have run up to his room."

"And Arl Eamon, where is he?" Elissa inquired.

"Upstairs in his chambers," Isolde answered in a quiet voice, clearly upset. "I think the demon has been keeping him alive."

"So, if we destroy the demon, then…" Bann Teagan spoke out loud what Elissa was wondering herself.

"Then my husband may perish." Isolde answered, her voice laden with grief.

"Then what are our options?" Elissa asked pragmatically.

For the first time since they entered the room she heard Alistair speak, his voice deep and thoughtful.

"I wouldn't normally suggest slaying a child, but… he _is_ an abomination. I'm not sure there's any choice," he said warily, looking towards Isolde and Bann Teagan.

"We can't kill a young boy, demon or no demon," Leliana interjected. "Please don't say we're considering that," she asked, grabbing Elissa's arm.

Before Elissa had time to compose a reply, Bann Teagan intervened. "Connor is my nephew, but…he is also possessed by a demon." His voice broke as he continued, "Death would be merciful."

"No! What…what about the mage?" Isolde cried desperately. "He could know something of this demon. He still lives, we could speak to him."

"Yes, he is still alive in the dungeon." Elissa said, remembering her encounter with the mage.

"Then we should bring him here immediately," Isolde suggested. "I… I do not know how much we can trust him, but we must find out what he knows." She turned towards the Bann, "Teagan, could you find him?"

"I…will try. Though, if he resists, I will not hesitate to kill him." Teagan turned and walked towards the door.

Teagan returned quickly, accompanied by the mage.

"You're lucky to be alive, Jowan." Isolde said to the mage, her voice full of hate. "After all you've done…"

"I didn't summon any demon, Lady Isolde," Jowan spoke in his defense, "But I did poison the Arl, and started all this," he admitted. "I'm willing to help if you'll let me."

The mage turned to face them all and continued, "The demon inside Connor needs to be destroyed. Killing Connor is the easiest way to do that, certainly, but there is another way. A mage could confront the demon in the Fade, without hurting Connor himself."

"What do you mean?" Bann Teagan demanded. "Is the demon not within Connor?"

"Not physically. The demon approached Connor in the Fade while he dreamt and controls him from there. We can use the connection between them to find the demon." The mage seemed confident of his knowledge.

"You can enter the Fade then, and kill the demon without hurting my boy?" Isolde asked, hopeful for the best.

"No, but I can enable another mage to do so." Jowan explained. "It normally requires lyrium and several mages, but I have… blood magic."

"How is that different?" Elissa asked, trying to understand what all of it meant.

"Lyrium provides the power for the ritual, but I can take that power from someone's life energy. This ritual requires a lot of it, however." After a slight hesitation, Jowan continued, "All of it, in fact."

"So," Bann Teagan asked incredulously, "someone must die? Someone must be sacrificed?"

"Yes, and then we send another mage into the Fade. I can't enter because I'm doing the ritual." Jowan answered.

Everybody was silent from shock, or perhaps just not daring to say anything.

The mage hurriedly spoke again. "Maybe I shouldn't have said anything; it's not much of an option."

"Is there no other way?" Elissa asked.

"Power has to come from somewhere," Jowan answered, "and that means either lyrim, or…blood."

"Then let it be my blood!" Isolde stood before Jowan, determined. "I will be the sacrifice."

"What?" Bann Teagan grabbed her arm. "Isolde, are you mad? Eamon would never allow this."

Isolde freed herself from his grasp and answered him angrily. "Either someone kills my son to destroy that thing inside him, or I give my life so my son can live. To me, the answer is clear."

"Blood magic. How can more evil be of any help here?" Alistair asked rhetorically. "Two wrongs don't make a right."

"It does seem like a sensible choice, with a willing participant." Morrigan interjected, winning a glare from Alistair.

"Connor is blameless in this. He should not have to pay the price." Isolde said, searching Elissa's face for a response.

They all seemed to look expectantly at her. Isolde's pleadings and her willingness to sacrifice herself for her child, made Elissa hesitate. Isolde loved her child more than anything. Elissa felt something break inside of her. She will never experience such a deep connection, she thought; never have the possibility to know what it is to have a child. Who was to say that she would not have done anything and everything for her own child? Maybe Isolde's actions were not so hard to understand. But no matter what, she would not decide who should live and who should die. She would not choose between a mother and a child.

"No," Elissa said determinedly. "There must be another way. Lyrium, where can we find it?" she asked looking at Jowan, but Alistair responded.

"We can find lyrium among mages at the Circle of Magi. If they would even do it." he added bitterly.

"Then we should go there and find out." Elissa turned towards him and their eyes met.

"That is an excellent point," Alistair answered, a mutual understanding passing between them. "One of the treaties is also for the Circle of Magi after all," Alistair voiced out loud, for the others to understand.

"But what will happen here?" Isolde asked, worried. "Connor will not remain passive forever."

"I will take that risk," Elissa answered. She had made her decision. "You will have to watch him," she spoke, as she looked at Isolde and Teagan, "and try not to provoke him." Turning towards the apostate mage, she added, "And you, Jowan, are going to help them if you know what's best for you."

"The Tower is about a day's journey across the lake," Bann Teagan told her. "Go quickly then. The longer you are away, the greater the chances of disaster."

"We will get ready and be on our way immediately." Elissa assured him and Isolde.


	3. Chapter 3

Before anything else, I would like to thank to the wonderful beta reader and talented writer under the pen name **Adalae_Amell**, who has done an excellent job at editing this story.

Disclaimer: The story is based on the characters from the game _Dragon Age:Origins_. It will most likely make more meaning if you played the game.

Intro and background: The episode described in this story takes place on their first visit to Denerim. They had just saved Connor from the demon possession, and set out on a quest for the Urn of Secret Ashes, a relic which supposedly can help Arl Eamon recover from his illness. They (Elissa Cousland, Alistair, Morrigan, Leliana, Sten, Shale and Fenris the dog) are on their way to find information about Brother Genitivi and his research on the Urn. I intend to write other episodes which took place before the first story I posted and this one at a later point in time. I'll eventually try to arrange them chronologically, but until then, hope you'll enjoy this one.

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Soon after she lay down to sleep, Elissa heard the heavy fall of rain drops on the canvas above her. She was surprised at the sudden change of weather; half an hour ago there hadn't been any sign of rain. She thought how lucky they all were that the abhorrent weather started now, when they all were under shelter; apart from Fenris and Shale, who were caught out in the rain. Her faithful mabari always slept right outside her tent. The stone golem did not need shelter against weather, nor food or sleep. Elissa thought how fortunate they had been to stumble upon such a creature, and what a curious thing it was.

Alistair's concern had been put to shame, so far; he always objected against new additions to their party. Elissa liked his thoughtfulness though, which supplemented her tendency to see the best in everyone, until proven otherwise.

The noise of the pelting rain became louder and so did the rushing wind. The canvas of her tent flapped violently, as the whipping wind struck her tent. Elissa crouched to the floor and with her hand, felt for any water leaking in. She could barely see anything in the dark and was suddenly blinded by the cloth that fell on top of her. The poles to her left gave in and the tent was knocked over. As she was struggling to lift the cloth and find her way out, she heard Fenris bark and pull on the canvas.

"No Fenris, stop that right now!" she exclaimed, afraid he would make matters worse.

She heard more ruffling outside her tent, and was about to chastise Fenris again, until someone lifted the canvas of the tent; she found it easier to move, free from the dead weight of the fallen tent.

"Elissa, are you all right?" Alistair asked.

"Yes, I am fine." she said as she got out. The cold drops of rain felt like needles on her skin, and her clothes got soaked almost immediately. "Can we fix this?" she said, trying to lift one of the poles; she dropped it in shock as a sharp wind caused the rain to whip against her skin, paralyzing her with cold. She wrapped her arms tight around her chest, trying to secure whatever warmth was left in her body.

"What's going on? Elissa, do you need help?" Leliana shouted from her tent.

"No, we got it," Elissa shouted back. "There's no need for you to get out in this weather as well."

"Let's go." Alistair said firmly, grabbing her arm. "You won't be able to sleep here tonight."

"Wait, Alistair." Elissa said, squirming in his grip. "I need to make sure the canvas won't get blown away."

"Don't worry; I'll take care of it. Hurry now, you're freezing," he said, pulling her behind him.

Elissa followed him and they walked quickly towards his tent, which was the closest to hers; she stopped mid-entrance.

"I am all wet and muddy." Elissa said; a shy smile played across her lips. "I don't want to go in any further before I at least clean my feet. Do you have something I can use?"

"Wait here." Alistair answered, placing a blanket around her shoulders. He gently maneuvered himself around her, stepping back into the rain.

Elissa heard him and Fenris around the tent; she guessed he was securing it. The wind seemed to only gather in strength, she realized. She shuddered as the gust of wind pushed cold air inside. When Alistair returned, dropping something at her feet, he stepped into the tent in and lit a small lamp.

"You know, there's also snow coming." he said; his wet clothes were pasted to his skin, and water dripped from his hair. "I got your backpack," he continued, pointing his chin towards it. "You need to change your clothes."

"Thanks," Elissa said, grabbing the bag. "But-"

"Don't worry, I'll wait outside." Alistair interjected. He slowly turned to leave the tent before Elissa placed a hand on his arm.

"No," she said, hasty. "You don't have to. I mean… just turn around. And, can you please hand me a towel?"

"Of course," he said, handing her a folded washcloth from his pack. "You can use this one."

Elissa placed her bag on the ground again, grabbed the cloth and handed him the blanket. He took it and turned around to look the other way. Feeling slightly awkward, Elissa turned her back towards him as well, and bended to search her bag. She only had one pair of nightclothes, the ones she was now wearing. The best thing she found to replace them was a long shirt. She dropped her wet cloths in a hurry, put the dry shirt on then used the discarded wet shirt to clean her feet. The dry towel she used for her face and hair.

"Well, I am decent now." she said turning.

Alistair turned and looked at her from head to toe; Elissa saw and _heard_ his hard swallow. She felt the heat flourishing on her cheeks, and tried to pull down her shirt, which only reached mid- thigh.

"You've got goose bumps." he said placing the blanket again around her shoulders once again. He held it a moment longer than necessary, then dropped his hands and took a quick step back, clearing his throat. He turned and knotted the strings on the flaps of the tent to stop them from fluttering in the wind. It made a noticeable difference in temperature, Elissa thought as she embraced the warmth of the blanket.

"Poor Fenris," Elissa said, worried for her faithful mabari. "I hope he'll be all right."

"I'm sure he will. Mabari can survive much worse weather than this, you know that." Alistair offered, reassuringly.

Elissa became acutely aware of their closeness in the confinement of the tent; the heat radiating from his body had a strange effect on hers. She fastened the blanket around herself and took a few small steps back.

"I will turn around now so you can change your clothes as well." she said; she was glad to find a reason to put some space between them. The way his wet clothes molded to his body, revealing shapes Elissa had not seen before, made her pulse quicken. Ogling at him was not helping with her blushing, she reflected. Afraid she might get caught staring, causing things to get awkward, she cleared her throat in hopes that he would move.

"All right, but make sure not to peek." he said teasingly.

"I've never been in your tent before." Elissa said trying to keep from turning her head towards the movement and noises behind her.

"What do you think then?" he asked, playfully.

"It's smaller than mine, and surprisingly tidy," Elissa said, examining her surroundings.

Alistair chuckled, "What were you expecting?"

"I don't know … lots of dirty socks?" she offered, jokingly.

"You caught me." he laughed heartily, warming her heart. "But, I only bring those out when I want to keep people away."

"I should be flattered then? By your courtesy?" she asked, amused.

"That's right. With you dear lady, I am always on my best behavior." he said, now standing very close behind her.

Elissa felt his warm breath on the back of her neck, and turned quickly towards him; she took a small step back stumbling on the blanket she was now entrapped in.

Alistair grabbed her arms to steady her.

"See? It's what I've been saying." he said, grinning with a warmth in his eyes that made her stomach flutter. Too nervous to hold his intense gaze, she looked down and he let go; her eyes fell on the bedroll at their feet.

"Maybe I should go sleep with Leliana," Elissa said, staring at the bedroll, as if it would help her situation.

Alistair coughed, or choked back a laugh- Elissa wasn't sure.

"Why would you want to go out in the storm again?" He asked, smiling warmly at her.

"Well, you know…she is a woman, and ... I cannot sleep here."

"Riiight." he said. "And how is it better to lay in the close proximity of a woman than of your fellow Grey Warden?"

"Leliana is a friend." Elissa said, well aware than she wasn't answering his question. "And you know what I mean." She wasn't sure who she was trying to please- herself, or the other's opinion. She sure didn't feel like going out in the icy rain again, but sleeping so close to a man without society' s blessing was violating everything she had learned from her parents; it was making her feel uneasy, like she was doing something wrong.

"Then let me ask you this. What am I to you?" Alistair asked lifting an eyebrow, genuine curiosity in his voice.

"Well, you're my best friend." Elissa said looking at him, and realized how deep that feeling was. He was the one person in her life she trusted the most now, when everybody she knew and cared about was gone. He had been there for her ever since she met him, and she felt a strong attachment to him. She could not imagine him ever wanting to hurt her.

"Well," he said with a satisfied smile, "it's settled then."

"I guess so," she said, unsure of what to do next. "But this bed is so small. How are we going to sleep?"

"We'll manage. It's not that small. Ladies first." he said, giving her an encouraging smile.

Her 'Fine,' had a stubborn note to it. She lay down on her back on the covers on the ground, covering her body with the blanket from head to toe. Alistair smiled and stepped carefully around her, placed the lamp close by; he sat down by her left side, blew the light off, then she felt him lay on his back as well.

"Won't you cover yourself?" Elissa asked expectantly.

"I don't have any other blanket," he answered.

"Oh, I'm sorry." she said, "I didn't know. Ohm… I guess we can share." she said and pulled the edge of the blanket from underneath her.

"No, I don't need to, I'm fine." he said firmly.

"Please Alistair, don't be stubborn. It's freezing, and I would feel terrible if you caught a cold because of me." she said determined, feeling the heat encompassing her cheeks.

"And you call me stubborn?" he chuckled, pulling on the blanket.

They lay in silence for a few moments. The canvas was rustling at every gust, and the rain was falling heavily. Alistair's body was only inches away from hers, and Elissa could feel it warming her left side.

"I cannot sleep on my back." she said in a low voice.

"You sleep however you like. However you feel comfortable." He offered; Elissa could hear the weariness in his tone.

She turned on her side facing him, lifting her knees only slightly for better balance, but careful not to touch him; he remained still.

"Better?" he asked softly.

"Yes. Good night Alistair." she whispered.

"Good night my-… good night Elissa."

She wondered what he was about to say and if she would even be able to sleep. This was the closest she had ever been to a man and she felt her whole body tense. Even her breathing was constricted by the tensing muscles and it became a conscious process to breathe.

The weather outside the tent was raging, and the rain was hitting violently on the canvas. The temperature was quite low inside the tent, despite the decent isolation it provided. Her nose was cold and she felt herself drawn to the warmth emanating from his body. His regular breathing had a calming effect, and it made her feel safe and sound. With the sound of his breathing soothing her like a lilting lullaby, she drifted into the Fade.

When she became conscious again, she did not open her eyes right away. She wanted to enjoy the comfortable warmth a little longer, but awareness brought with it the memory of last night, and she quickly opened her eyes. Much to her consternation, she found herself in Alistair's embrace. She didn't remember when she shifted during the night, but her forehead was now resting on his shoulder and his chin was resting on her head. Her knees were resting on the thighs of his bended legs, and his arm was wrapped around her waist. His shirt was tickling her nose and his smell was intoxicatingly delightful. She marveled at how good it felt to feel him so close, and struggled with the desire to cuddle closer to his chest. A wave of heat from inside her body washed over her and her cheeks flushed. Alistair was still fast asleep and she was glad for it; it would seem she would be spared the embarrassment. She lifted her head and tried to gently move his hand away, but he protested with a soft moan, reflexively tightening his grip around her. Elissa held her breath. On her second attempt to get away, Alistair shifted his body and woke.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I…" he said confused, and removed his arm, moving his body away form hers.

Elissa thought he must have been feeling just as awkward as she did. "It's all right," she said, smiling slightly. "No harm done." She lifted herself in a sitting position.

"Did you sleep well?" he asked, lifting himself on his elbow.

"Yes, thank you." She turned to look at him and smiled when she met his eyes. "I didn't have any nightmares last night."

The initial confusion on his face was now replaced by a smug smile. "Then maybe you should sleep with me more often. Ohm … I mean… by my side." he said, flustered.

"Maybe," she laughed, "If that's indeed the cause. But what would you get out of it, other than less space? That wouldn't be fair to you, would it?" she said arching her eyebrows.

"What can I say?" he chuckled. "I like to be at your service."

"Then," she said, removing the blanket and getting up, "you can come help me with my tent. It seems the storm is over. I hope I'll still find I find my tent there." She walked and gathered her stuff, then turned and looked expectantly at him.

"Right." he said. "Just give me a moment."


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N  
**

First a big thanks to my beta reader **Adalae_Amell ** who has edited this chapter. If you like Dragon Age related fanfiction, allow me to recommend you **Adalae_Amell ** 's stories.

Info and background on this chapter: The episode below is chronologically a big leap forward in the story compared to the previous chapters. It takes place in the Deep Roads, where the two Wardens and some of their companions are searching for Paragon Branka.

If you are wondering about my plans regarding this story, I can tell you that I intend to keep writing as soon as I'll have more time. Other episodes which take place in between the ones already published will came at a later date.

I hope you'll enjoy reading. Also, your thoughts about it are welcommed.

* * *

Elissa woke up startled before she realized she'd only been dreaming. It was pitch black in the tunnels. She felt Alistair's arm around her; she was safe in his embrace. She pressed her body against his, cradling his arm up to her chest.

"My love?" Alistair spoke groggily.

"I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" she whispered.

"Yes, my body is so attuned to yours, it responds to your every move," he said softly with amusement in his voice, slightly adjusting his position to hold her closer.

"Sorry," she said, squeezing his hand around her breast, slightly rubbing her backside against him; she felt his length harden against her back. "Hm, you're right." she giggled.

"Love, stop moving or I won't be able to control myself any longer." he pleaded, nestling his face in her hair.

Elissa knew the feeling- the lack of control. Since they entered the Deep Roads almost a month ago, there had been no time for proper rest. And when they rested, they slept in close proximity to the others in their party for safety reasons. Darkspawn were not the only danger lurking about in the Deep Roads. There was no place for tents in the tunnels, and there was no reason to encumber themselves with them. So the tents were left behind in a camp outside Orzammar with Sten and Wynne. She and Alistair had been sharing the same bedroll and blanket, but they never had any privacy.

She brought his hand near her mouth, and with a muffled whisper she spoke, "I don't want you to," then sucked on his finger.

He moaned and pressed himself against her. "But what about the others?" he asked gasping.

"They're sleeping. We'll be quiet." she whispered, as she guided his hand into her breeches.

Her gesture removed the last traces of his reservation and he quickly found his way to her core. She covered her mouth with her hand, and bid herself to stop her moans while his fingers slid in and out, and his thumb gently rubbed her hot wet slick. She arched her back, pressing her bottom against his groin, and felt his hard length through their clothes. He rubbed against her as she rocked into the machinations of his hand. Her pleasure and desire reached unbearable heights as she purred his name, but he didn't stop until he felt her quiver under his touch. Alistair pushed her breeches down, along with her smallclothes, and quickly he freed himself of his own. At the touch of her skin on his own, he groaned her name. Elissa arched her back, lifting her bottom; she cradled him between her thighs, rubbing her wet slick on his length. He muffled his moans in her hair, sending shivers of pleasure down her spine.

He grabbed her hips and pulled her against him, lifting her and parting her folds with his hand as he slid inside her. She placed her hand on the ground for support and pressed against him, engulfing him deep inside her, squeezing her inner muscles around him. They both moaned louder than they ought to in the silence of the caves.

"Oh, Maker, you feel so good," he said in a hoarse low voice, moving slowly inside her.

His hand slid under her shirt and fondled her breast. He squeezed it, and gently rubbed her nipple while thrusting his hips into a delectable friction, while she met his every thrust. The wave of pleasure inside her was building up again, and she let herself be carried away. They moved together, matching each others rhythm. She bit her lip hard to stop the sounds of pleasure threatening to spill out. His hand glided down her stomach, reaching between her thighs, parting her wet folds and caressing her knob with agile fingers, while his movements gathered in speed. The wave of pleasure became unstoppable, crashed against her and overwhelmed her, taking her into a climactic frenzy; she brought Alistair with her. The cascade of pleasure made them both cry out when her inner muscles started contracting rhythmically around him. He thrust his throbbing length deep inside her, spending himself.

They were both panting as they lay still for a few moments, catching their breath. When Alistair pulled away, they both cringed and gasped.

As he held her against his chest, she sighed comfortably and whispered, "You are a wonderful man. I missed you so much."

"Missed me?" he said, lifting himself on his elbow and placing a kiss below her ear. "But I've been right here all along."

"I missed _this_." she said, giggling at the delightful feeling of his cool lips on her hot skin. "You, inside me."

"I've spoiled you." he said laughing, nuzzling her neck. "I've missed you, too." he whispered in her ear making her shiver. He gave her another kiss before lying back down behind her. "Sleep now, my love."

She fell asleep feeling satisfied and happy. It felt like barely a moment had passed when Alistair gently squeezed her shoulder, and spoke softly in her ear "My love, wake up."

There was light coming through an opening where Shale was holding a torch, and she saw the others packing up.

Elissa turned back towards Alistair. "Already?" she groaned.

"I'm afraid so," he said smiling, but otherwise looking weary, his hair in disarray.

She sighed and began to arrange her clothes under the blanket. She hoped the others wouldn't notice, but she felt slightly embarrassed to be with her pants down while they all were fussing around her.

She stood, strapped her armor and weapons on, and packed her belongings. Their breakfast, which Leliana handed out, consisted of an apple and two biscuits, hardly enough to just silence their stomachs, but they had to ration their food carefully.

She took one last look at the map and pointed out their direction. They were close to leaving the sinister abandoned Thaig behind them, and enter yet another tunnel which was supposed to lead them further into the Deep Roads.

"My dear Warden," said Zevran, in his characteristic fawning tone. He fell behind the rest of the group, matching her pace, "Allow me to congratulate you. You are exquisite in every aspect."

"What are you talking about?" Elissa asked, detached.

He laughed. "I'm talking about your performance. You've been torturing me, yet you don't even know it," he complained teasingly. "Never before have I experienced such delightful torture."

"On second thought" she said, striding away from the Antivan elf. "I don't think I want to know what you're talking about."

She never cared for the elf's insinuating comments or flirtations, and he made her feel uncomfortable. She caught up with Leliana, who was walking a few steps behind Alistair and Morrigan at the front of their party.

"So," Leliana started with an impish look on her face, "you and Alistair…"

"Alistair and I what?" Elissa could her feel annoyance with the Bard well up inside of her, but tried not to cast it in her tone.

"You and Alistair- together, looking content. You have a glow about you. So shameless." The Bard replied with a sly grin.

"Shameless?" Elissa asked, surprised.

Leliana stared at Elissa intently as she spoke, "Well, you know, radiating joy and love, while everyone has to face death and the Blight and a bleak future by themselves. Terrible, gloating like that."

"I'm not gloating, am I? But yes," Elissa said thoughtfully, "he does make me very happy." She smiled and felt all warm inside while thinking about how much she loved him.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Leliana again. "So, how is Alistair?"

"What do you mean?" she asked, blissfully ignorant.

"You know what I mean. You and Alistair… last night. He must be quite delightful, you wouldn't be so happy otherwise, I think. He's athletic, that's always nice. He is also good at following instructions, isn't he?" Leliana kept going.

Elissa was caught by surprise, and wondered if her companions were even sleeping during her little escapade with Alistair. She briefly wondered if they had woken everybody up. Either way, she decided to play along. "Yes, sometimes he has brilliant ideas of his own too," she chuckled.

"Ooo, fascinating." Leliana giggled. "The little templar is all grown up and apparently he …ahem …plays well with others."

"Oh, yes," Elissa replied in turn with a mischievous smile, "he's very grown up."

They both laughed. "Oh, now you're just making me jealous." Leliana complained.

"Hey, what are you two giggling about?" Alistair asked aloud, looking back at the pair.

"Nothing." Elissa answered quickly. "Just… Darkspawn."

"Yes, I'm sure." He said unconvinced, pursing his lips. "Darkspawn are so hilarious."

"I do wonder." Morrigan asked in a subdued tone addressing Alistair, but loud enough for Elissa to hear as well. "Is it permissible for two Grey Wardens to …oh, what is the word I search for?"

"Caboodle?" Alistair answered mockingly, making Leliana giggle.

"Fraternize." Morrigan said sternly.

"What's wrong with fraternizing?" he inquired innocently.

"It seems most undisciplined," Morrigan answered in the same harsh tone, "for an organization that claims it will do whatever is necessary to end the Darkspawn threat."

"One thing has nothing to do with the other." he said, determined.

Elissa wondered what the witch was getting at, but she got her answer right away.

"Oh no?" Morrigan asked contemptuously. "And what if a Grey Warden is forced to choose between the Warden he loved and ending the Blight? What should his choice be?"

"That is a …a ridiculous question." Alistair said waving his arm and shaking his head dismissively.

"And I have my answer. Most kind of you." Morrigan said with satisfaction.

Zevran, who had caught up with them for the last part of the conversation, interfered, "My good friend Alistair, might I offer you a bit of advice?"

"I like my hair the way it is, thank you." Alistair answered shortly.

"Truly? As you wish… though my advice is regarding something else completely. It has to do with your recent …exertions with your fellow Grey Warden that I overheard."

"My…? Oh." Alistair said apprehensively.

"It did seem as if you just got going when all grew quiet. You are… feeling all right, yes? Perhaps you are tired?" Zevran said suavely.

Elissa was annoyed at the elf's boldness, even though she knew by now that his usual manner was unacceptable and shocking at times. Alistair seemed to share her opinion when he answered in outrage.

"We aren't talking about this, are we? Did I hit my head?"

The elf continued unhindered, "I have some roots from home that you may chew if you need energy. As for volume you ought to try arching your…"

"Whoa! Whoa! Awkward!" Alistair interrupted, flushed by the current subject matter.

"You Fereldens are so finicky." The elf joked lightly. "How will you ever learn how to pleasure each other unless you talk about it?"

"Ok, that's enough!" Elissa said firmly, commanding their obedience. "One more smart comment from any of you and I'll throw you to the first Darkspawn we meet."

She and Alistair exchanged meaningful glances before they both burst out laughing, leaving their companions to wonder.


End file.
